Fourteen

I feel like I'm a teenager again. I can talk to someone from my past and no matter how much things have changed, and trust me allot has, every time we talk I go right back to that young girl who gets giddy every time he smiles at me and it's just ridiculous that I can turn into this. I'm almost 20 years old I've had plenty of guys after him and I like to think of myself as a level headed person who is usually pretty confident. But not when it comes to you that's for sure.

My first doesn't get why it's bad she says I should enjoy the feeling but years of experience has shown me that it won't end well and that the feeling is just going to be short lived. That in my head i now start comparing this feeling to the one I get with other guys but there isn't a compare because this feeling is so deep rooted and only one other thing beats it and I'm not strong enough to go through that tonight.

Ugh well in a weeks time I will have found something else and he will begone along with my fourteen year old self that is forcing her way out will go away for a few more months atleast.